John writes “I work with a woman who is controlling, evil, bitchy, back stabbing, hates men, manipulates, wants to be the center of attention, refuses to do the work when work is involved, goofs off, is always disrespectful of me, but tries to turn it around and say that I am disrespectful. She is just plain evil. I have tried everything from talking to other people and professionals, etc. Nothing I do works. She is un-cooperative at work, won’t help and offers every stumbling block possible to try and keep me from doing my job. What do I do? I don’t hate her, but it is impossible. The boss doesn’t want to take care of major issues and every time something comes up, she throws it back in my face and twists everything around and tries to make me look like the bad person. What do I do?
Looks like you are stuck with an employee from hell. Here are three things that you can do:
1. If quitting is an option, do it as soon as possible, because the mental strain it is putting on you will eventually lead to health problems for you and even if the new job pays less or is less desirable in other ways, you are going to be still better off because you wouldn’t have to deal with nonsense at work.
2. You have not mentioned if you have spoken to human resources or higher ups in the organization. If she is thriving in the company, there must be a reason, or it could simply be that she is too good at playing the politics and no one at the top really knows her true colors. If you do approach the superiors, be prepared for the consequences. If she is really well connected at the top, it is you who could be axed. Many employees like her are just very crafty people and continue to go ahead by being mean because in the eyes of the management they are the ones who are getting things done, are leaders, and are willing to force others to work even harder.
3. If these two do not work for you, try a more spiritual approach. Think of her as merely a problem that you have to deal with on a daily basis, like daily commute or pain in your back. Don’t let her control your life. By yielding all this power to her, you have let her take charge of your emotions. Also try to compartmentalize your life. Yes, she is difficult at work, but put that behind you after you leave work. All of this is not easy to do, but these are some coping techniques while dealing with difficult people, and we all seem to have them in our lives, either at home or at work.
BTW, have you ever wondered if you could actually “join” her? Basically get on her side by boosting her ego, make her feel even better about her….basically, becoming friends with the Devil.